'A brotherhood' - The Sheffield groups helping men with their mental health

Every Monday evening across Sheffield, groups of men meet up to get things off their chests and talk about how their week has been.

The sessions are part of Andy’s Man Club, a national charity with more than 350 groups nationwide including five in the Sheffield area.

The charity has a growing reputation in the city, with Sheffield United recently renaming a stand at Bramall Lane to raise awareness.

Area lead Lewis Gregory said the evenings involve taking turns to answer five questions.

The first three are the same every week: How’s your week been, one positive from your week and anything to get off your chest.

He said the last two questions vary, but the theme is one to “make you think” and a quick fire question, like “what’s your favourite smell.”

He said: “In a room full of blokes, asking what’s your favourite smell? You get quite colourful answers. It leaves the lads laughing, to pick everyone up from asking such a heavy question, like question three.

“These are designed, in my opinion, perfectly, to raise the spirits back up, and be like, it’s not all bad. Let’s have a quick laugh and go out and enjoy your week.

“On paper, it sounds really simple. But I’ve been going for five and a half years and I know it works.”

Lewis said years ago, he was struggling financially and was going to attempt suicide.

“My wife had seen Andy’s Man Club on Facebook two weeks before,” he said. “She rang me, told me about it, and I started attending.

“I became a facilitator, and then I became a lead facilitator for the group, and now I work for them.

“Every one of our area leads has started as a user. I think that’s why the job works so well, because we know what it’s like, so we can come here and say, the hardest thing you’re ever gonna do is go through that door for the first time.”

Each Andy’s Man Club group meets on a Monday between 7pm and 9pm. The charity works closely with GPs and while it doesn’t require referrals, people do get referred in.

“I think that reliability of always on a Monday, always at the same time, really benefits the lads that attend,” Lewis said.

“If they’ve had a bad week, they know, right I’ve got Andy’s Man Club on Monday. If I could just stick it out until then, I can just get all this off my chest.”

Lewis said seeing men go from first walking through the door, to feeling more able to get things off their chest is “a beautiful thing to witness.”

He understands the thought of being vulnerable scares people.

“I think the biggest thing is definitely the stigma behind it,” Lewis said. “We’ve been conditioned to be the man of the house, the breadwinner, protect your family, stiff upper lip.”

Lewis thinks younger generations of men are opening up more, but says older men come too, with the oldest being “a 103-year-old just rocked up to a group”.

“I think, slowly but surely, we are breaking that barrier down.”

Lewis said the men he’s met through the club are now his best friends: “My kids call one of them uncle.

“Because you’re all going through something, it makes a different kind of friendship. It sounds a bit cringe, but it’s more of a brotherhood.”